Finally, My surgery.

What a fucking nightmare. 

My surgery was supposed to be nearly a year ago, and here I am, 9 months later, still with shit tits. 

The communication was pretty slow from New Hall and I was on the phone more often than not trying to get a surgery date. I had work and childcare to sort, I couldn’t just have a date sprung on me. I told them I wanted my surgery in January because generally in a hairdresser world, January is a funny month, so it made sense to take the month off. 

I’m still none the wiser when the hell my surgery date is, but I’ve had another pre-op appointment, brill! 

Didn’t faint this time though! hallelujah! I’ve been told my surgery will be within 8 weeks of my pre-op because the MRSA test is only valid for that length of time. 

 I decided I wanted to see Dr Masood for a final consultation, I didn’t need too, but I wanted too! I wasn’t happy with what we agreed a year ago. I’m 2 stone lighter now and I’m going into this consultation to tell him that basically I’m having implants or I’m not having the surgery. 

Kinda shitting myself that he’s gonna refuse again, but after I explained my concerns and what I wanted, he finally agreed to implants along with a lift, because I’d lost so much weight, a reduction was no longer needed and a lift would have left me with very small boobs, which is the last thing I wanted. 

Dr Masood offered me 3 sizes, 200cc, 250cc and 350cc! I had absolutely no idea what was the right size. What size was I gonna be happy with? Will 200 be too small? Will 350 be too big? I had no idea. He gave me the implants to hold, squeeze, compare. I played safe and went for 250cc! 

So, that was that, he informed me of the risks of having implants, the life span of implants and gave me the general surgery chat! Paper work signed, implants on order and now I have to wait for my date to come through. 

Now it was a waiting game.

After a few weeks, I got my appointment date through, for 16th January. 

I won’t lie, After BJ announced lockdown 3, I kinda thought it wasn’t gonna happen and it was going to be cancelled again! But New Hall assured me that it would 100% be going ahead. 

Now it was a case of packing my bag and getting ready. I had to have a covid test 48 hours prior to my surgery date and had to isolate from then until I was admitted on 16th. 

The morning of the 16th arrived, I didn’t sleep a wink the night before and I was nervous as fuck. Kyle picked me up at 7am and dropped me to the doors of New Hall, where I went in and was shown to my pre-surgery room. 

It was like a hotel, I actually couldn’t believe how comfortable I felt. 

So I’m sat in my room, I was told by the nurse to put my gown on, compression stockings, dressing gown and slippers on and make myself comfortable. I was waiting for the nurse to come and do all my observations, the anaesthetist to come and talk me through general anaesthetic and my surgeon who was going to come and explain surgery to me and line me up. 

I’m feeling pretty chill, once all of the above had been completed, it was a case of just waiting until theatre was ready for me. I was just on my phone, texting my mum, Kyle and Tillie. The nurse come in  and told me they would come and get me in 10 minutes and walk me down. 

Jesus wept, that was it! I was hysterical, absolutely sobbing! It’s funny now looking back! I text both Tillie & Ky and told them if anything happened to me that they were to make sure Lilli-Rae was always looked after! Which I knew they would. But it just made me feel better knowing I said it. 

I’m an absolute clown I know. 

Anyway, it’s 9.13am and I walk down to theatre, it looked nothing like I expected, I dunno what I was expecting, but it wasn’t that! There was 2 nurses and the anaesthetist waiting for me! One nurse took my dressing gown and slippers, I hopped on the bed and the other nurse was putting some compression things on my legs, Whilst the anaesthetist was putting my cannula in...They’re chatting away to me, I have no idea what they’re saying, but I’m feeling pretty monged out, and the next thing I’m gone, out for the bloody count. 

My surgery was due to take 3 hours...Well at 3.30pm I woke up in recovery! Literally feeling like I’ve had the best nights sleep in the world! I have no pain at this point! There was a nurse sat next to me and another at the end of the bed! All I remember saying was...

‘Alright girls? Fuck me, does that clock say 3.30pm?! Has anyone phoned me mum and ky?’ 

They were wetting themselves, they said that they’ve never seen anyone come around from general so chirpy and so normal, I felt absolutely fine! I was buzzing off me tits (pardon the pun, lol) and I just wanted to get back to my room so I could FaceTime Mum, Ky and Tillie. 

I mean I must have been on another planet because I can’t remember the way from recovery to my room, all I knew was I was bloody hungry and I wanted a coffee. 

When I got to my post op room all my bags etc were there and the nurse asked me if there was anything I wanted or needed, she gave me my phone and told me she would be back every half hour to check on me! 

Straight away I FaceTimed my mum, this is when I started to feel freaky! I just remember chatting and all of a sudden saying to her...

’I’ve got to go mum, I dunno where my bobble hat is, I need to find it!’

So I undone my leg compressions, shuffled down the bed and got out, fuck knows how, I was now in so much pain, to find my fucking winter hat! It did take about 20 mins to get down the bed!! Are you actually ok keets? 

Anyway, drama over and hat found! I spent the rest of the evening on FaceTime to either Ky or Tillie! Literally my life savers for keeping me sane as obviously because of covid I wasn’t allowed any visitors! 

It got to about 8pm and the pain was getting worse and worse, in the end I called for the nurse to give me some more medication. I was already having antibiotics through my cannula, codine and paracetamol every 4 hours but I couldn’t hack the pain any longer! So the nurse gave me some morphine! The god of all drugs! It was fucking insane! I felt like a new woman, well...for about an hour and a half...and then I was uncomfortable again. It was a strange pain, I knew I would be in pain, but it wasn’t my boobs that hurt! It was my arms, ribs and back! I literally felt paralysed from the stomach up! I had morphine every couple of hours throughout the night and the nurses come and checked my boobs and nipples regularly! My boobs had to be kept warm else there was a chance my nipples would die! So the nurse would come in, check my swelling and poke my nipples to make sure they were warm and reacting to touch! 

I couldn’t sit up on my own, I couldn’t reach to get anything, even when I went for a wee, it was hard work! I didn’t sleep much that night, I felt like it was the longest night of my life, I couldn’t get comfortable, I was bored and I just wanted to go home. I think I fell asleep about 4am and the bloody nurse come in at 6am and woke me up for observations, I was exhausted...but I knew I wanted to go home! I wanted to watch the Liverpool game! So I got shit done and made it look like I was capable to go home! 

So I got up, washed, brushed my teeth, done my hair and got dressed, tidied my room, packed my bags and just sat in the arm chair! When the nurse come in I asked what time I was going home, I knew I was meant to be in for two nights but not a hope in hell was that happening! She asked me how I felt and I smiled and told her I was fine! She looked at me like I had 10 heads and told me I’d had major surgery and it wasn’t recommended that I was discharged and that she would see what my surgeon suggested. 

I dozed most of the day in the arm chair, almost in and out of consciousness, I was absolutely shattered! 

Dr masood come and checked me over, checked my boobs and told me I can go home, providing I had someone with me at all time and if I promised that I would keep my boobs warm 24/7! 

They told me that I would be discharged at 2pm after I had eaten something! So I phoned Ky and asked him to pick me up then! I was so excited to go home! The nurses assessed me for a final time and gave me my bag of medication! And before I knew it the nurse was in my room telling me Kyle was here and I could go! She carried my bags down the corridor, I’m not gonna lie, I felt horrendous! I felt shaky as fuck, I felt like I was pissed, Basically, I was absolutely off my nut on morphine! 

The drive home was awful, Kyle couldn’t have driven any safer or more carefully...but every bump in the road, my tits felt! Luckily my house is 5 minutes from New Hall, so it wasn’t a long journey! I was so happy to be home, getting out the car was comical, I managed to spin myself round, but I just had no strength in my stomach to get me out of the seat! 

I had more medication as soon as I got in, antibiotics, codine, and paracetamol! Lilli-Rae was very very unsure when I got in, she said ‘hello mummy’ and carried on playing, I heard her say to my mum ‘I don’t wanna go to close to mummy because I don’t want to hurt her’ that broke my heart, I was so emotional, I just cried! I just wanted her to come and sit down with me and gimme a cuddle! She knew exactly what I’d had done, we’d spoken about it for weeks! Ky and I sat on the sofa, ordered a take away and watched the football! I felt exhausted, everything hurt and all i wanted was to be snuggled up on the sofa! I had my head on his shoulder and I just couldn’t keep my eyes open, strange because I could still hear everything, but was kinda asleep? 

The next 24 hours were absolutely vile. 

But il talk about that in my recovery post...My recovery from hell...morphine come down and covid.